Rédaction anglais

Rédaction anglais - Aide aux devoirs - Emploi & Etudes

Marsh Posté le 04-01-2009 à 19:53:29    

Bonjour à tous je suis en terminale S et j'ai une rédaction d'anglais à rendre pour demain et j'aimerais savoir si quelqu'un pouvait me la corriger. Le sujet est que je dois rédiger un article de presse sur une attaque raciste aux USA pendant les sixties, période de la loi sur les droits civiques.
merci d'avance.
 
Since Lyndon Johnson voted the law for the civil rights act, USA is affected by racist attack especially in the southern states. Indeed, white hate groups as the Ku Klux Klan which promote the segregation of the blacks, so, they threat the blacks by whipping and lynching to terrorize them. In this period of social tensions, their persecutions are more frequent because they want to show their opposition at the law.
 
Last evening, in our city of Brookhaven, an individual from the black community has been badly injured by a racist attack. Indeed, around 8 o’clock, M. Carter, an African American, was walking on the street to go back home after working. Suddenly, he saw four men with white hoods who made straight for him. They caught him and beat him with a lot of violence. In addition, they abused him with racial terms. He said to the white policeman “they call me nasty nigger”. But the policeman answered “it’s just some words without a real bad intention”. M. Carter explains with all the details how they acted with him but the policeman was just interested to know if M. Carter would aggressed this men or looked strangely to them before they struck him. M. Carter was completely disappointed by the reaction of the police. When he will go out of the hospital, he swears they will pay for this. His family knows about the accident and they want the offenders will be sent to prison but according to the police, they do not have a piece of evidence because the offenders was not caught red-handed.  
 
To sum up, this type of story is very common in the state of Mississippi since the sixties, even if the civil rights act forbid the segregation of the black the mentalities have not changed and the states of the south still very racist. In other words, the law do not prevent that the black community is persecuted by the white. Furthermore, all the country is corrupt with these attacks, even the police, which have to respect the law, take part in the oppression of the black community. We Hope that the media like us would can always show these information to make the people sensitive.  
 
                                                                                                  Monday, February 8th, 1961

Message cité 1 fois
Message édité par surfactory83 le 05-01-2009 à 22:12:47
Reply

Marsh Posté le 04-01-2009 à 19:53:29   

Reply

Marsh Posté le 05-01-2009 à 22:19:33    

Je viens de modifier les améliorations de ma rédaction. Si quelqu'un pourrait juste y jeter un coup d'œil je lui en serait très reconnaissant.
merci

Reply

Marsh Posté le 07-01-2009 à 16:23:57    

USA has been affected by racist attack
 
Indeed, white people hate groups like which promotes the segregation of the black people,

Reply

Marsh Posté le 07-01-2009 à 16:32:37    

an man from the black community  
 
he saw four white-hooded men
 
He said to the white policeman that they called him nasty nigger”
But the policeman answered that it was just some words without a real bad intention
 
M. Carter explained
 
whether M. Carter would have aggressed these men

Reply

Marsh Posté le 07-01-2009 à 16:40:57    

When he will goes out of the hospital, he swears thatthey will pay for this. His family knows about the accident and they hope the offenders will be sent to prison.but According to the police, they do not have a piece of  evidence because the offenders was not caught red-handed.  

Reply

Marsh Posté le 07-01-2009 à 16:49:45    

surfactory83 a écrit :

Since Lyndon Johnson voted the law for the civil rights act, USA is has been affected by racist attacks especially in the southern states. Indeed, white people hate groups such as the Ku Klux Klan which promote the segregation of the blacks, so, they threat the blacks people by whipping and lynching to terrorize them. In During this period of social tensions, their persecutions are were more frequent because they want to show their opposition at to the law.
 
Last evening, in our city of Brookhaven, an individual a person from the black community has been badly injured by a racist attack. Indeed, around 8 o’clock, M. Carter, an African American, was walking on the street to go back home after working. Suddenly, he saw four men with white hoods who made straight for (????)him. They caught him and beat him with a lot of violence. In addition Moreover, they abused him with racial terms. He said to the white policeman “they call me nasty nigger”. But the policeman answered “it’s just some words without a real bad intention”. M. Carter explainsed with all the details how they had acted with him but the policeman was just interested toin knowing if M. Carter would aggressed this wanted to attack [ou] attacked these men or looked strangely to at them before they struck beat him up. M. Carter was completely disappointed by the reaction of the policeman. When he will go out of the hospital, he swears they will pay for this. His family knows about the accident and they want the offenders will be sent to prison but according to the police, they do not have a piece of evidence because the offenders was not caught red-handed. ==> Il faut mettre au passé.
 
To sum up, this type of story epitome is very common in the state of Mississippi since the sixties nowadays, even if the civil rights act forbid the segregation of the black people the mentalities have not changed and the states of the South are still very racist. In other words, the law do did not prevent that the black community is persecuted by the white black people from being persecuted by some white people. Furthermore, every country is corrupted [qu'as-tu voulu dire par "all the countries are corrupted" ?], even the police, which have to respect the law, take part in the oppression of the black community. We Hope that the media like us will can be able to show these informations to make people aware of the situation.
 
                                                                                                  Monday, February 8th, 1961


 
Visiblement, tu es un journaliste des années 60, donc il faut raconter ça comme si c'était quelque chose d'actuel, de récent. Certaines phrases sont à mettre au passé (car ça s'est passé la nuit précédente) et d'autres au présent.


Message édité par Meloti le 08-01-2009 à 21:34:20

---------------
When I Was Trapped In The Darkness And Couldn't See The Light, I Was Waiting For The Helping Hand...
Reply

Sujets relatifs:

Leave a Replay

Make sure you enter the(*)required information where indicate.HTML code is not allowed